Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
