my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
