fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
