She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
