garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
