He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
