Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
