weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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