U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
