True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
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