She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
