Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
