If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
