never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
