About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize