yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
