Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
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