butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize