If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
