Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
