it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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