Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
