She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
