It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
