You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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