billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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