dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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