I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
