i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
