i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize
