But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
