you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
