But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
