i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
