I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
