Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Actions speak louder than pants.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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