Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
