this boner is exhausting
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
