I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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