Kareoke will never be a sober sport
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
