You can't special order awesome
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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