I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Are we still banned from the library?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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