I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
