Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
