Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I FOUND THE LEGS
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I think my moral compass just broke
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
