I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
