Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Randomize
