You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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