Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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