ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
